My Wife Is Addicted To Her Cell Phone Help
My wife is constantly on her cell-phone. She is so connected with messages and calls that it has more power over her than she realizes. Its a drug. Even the children notice that she can hardly have a conversation without having one eye on the phone. Sometimes I want to flush it down the toilet. What should I do?
Push back will not help at all…..
Keep in mind that it is hardly ever possible to force or push people into change others desire for them. You might have noticed people have a way of exerting equal pressure in the opposite direction when they feel coerced, cornered or trapped.
Therefore, Id suggest you do as little as possible but to attempt to create the ambiance for a helpful conversation about your concern. Choose a relaxed, unemotional moment and gently, clearly state what it is that you think is an issue, then challenge your wife to consider the impact her response to her mobile phone is having upon her life and family.
It is hardly likely that this will be news to her, so challenge her to find her own way out of her electronic bondage .
What To Do If Your Husband/wife Is Addicted To Phone
5 min read
Does your spouse spend more time on phone than with you? What are the odds that your spouse is actually a phone addict? Is phone addiction slowly becoming a factor that is ruining your relationship?
Spouse addiction to phone is a common complaint in every relationship these days. Unless you take steps to help your spouse get over phone addiction, the happiness in your relationship can soon disappear. You should be aware of the signs that your husband or wife is addicted to phone so that you can detect the addiction at an early stage.
In this article, you will find out the signs of phone addiction, how to find out why your spouse is addicted to phone as well as how to stop phone addiction for a better digital lifestyle and healthy relationship.
Good Guys 2 Great Men
Are you tired of rejection and ready to have the love, trust, affection and desire you want?
Do you want to feel more confident, clear and masculine in how you handle conflict and express yourself?
Here is what WORKS even when you feel like youre the only one trying!
You have 2 options:
If you are a man who is more inclined to take option #2, then read on. Youre about to hear some things you may not have heard before.
Does this sound familiar? Have you felt dismissed or rejected like this in any other ways? How long has it been going on?
The longer it has been going on, the more urgent it is that you start taking action now. Lets not settle for that any longer, okay?
Most women who consistently act distant, cold, and/or dismissive have already begun thinking about the possible end of their relationship.
In fact, most women tell me they start making their plans about 2 YEARS before they actually pull the trigger. And it all starts with a subtle a pattern of rejection, detachment, distance and disrespect.
Why dont they TELL us what they are feeling? Whats going on inside their heads and why cant they explain it to us?
Its unanimous. I hear it over and over again.
They believe thats what theyve been doing all along!
And men somehow miss the message.
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and also, we meet our parents and everything is cool, we wanna get married for about 3 or 4 years late i hope, i’ trying and working hard for her to make her happy in our marriage life. and her mom’s even knows about her addiction to her phone and we both are worried about her, i’ve Been through this myself and got hurt, i don’t want her to. He would be easily irritated, anger, raging, he would slap himself, tear shirts off himself and threaten to shoot himself. This was my life the last 1 year and a 1/2 . He had other addiction issues as well. We also did not go out much either anymore, usually just picked up something to eat.
When Your Girlfriend Has Become Addicted To Her Cell Phone
Dear Neil: My girlfriend is on her iPhone almost all the time when were together. When were in a restaurant, she checks her Facebook account in a movie theater, she texts her friends at a social gathering or party, she repeatedly checks her emails at her family dinner she is on Twitter while everyone else is talking or eating . And this is not because she is expecting an urgent message. This is every day, not just some days.
This is the same woman who tells me she wants to marry me and who is insanely passionate about me, so I dont think she is bored with me or otherwise disinterested in being close to me. And this doesnt just happen around me. At work, she is constantly checking Facebook, emails, voice mails, Skype or texts as well.
Its not like were from different generations, either, although she is 7 years younger than I am. I check my emails and texts also, but Im not immersed in them all day, every day. Why is she doing this, and what would you recommend that I do about it?
Annoyed in Canada
Dear Annoyed: Your girlfriend sounds as if she has become addicted to social media, and you sound as if you are feeling alone and isolated in her presence. This gives you the unmistakable feeling that although she is right next to you, she isnt really there in mind and spiritand her attention isnt with you either.
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Where To Start With The Help
If your partners addiction makes you feel anxious, scorned or even depressed then its high time to crack down to help your wife. To start with, find out the genuine reason for your wifes behavior. Perhaps your wife just kills her time with a smartphone. Social networks keep her busy. There is a possibility your beloved find your relationship boring and routine so that the phone helps her to get distracted and fill in time.
She might also not fully realize that her actions hit you or vice versa she might intentionally avoid you. To figure that out, ask your addicted to smartphone wife to spend an hour together without any distractions. Then be interested if she goes nuts on you or youve insulted her in any way. If thats the point let her explain the matter. Try not to interrupt or defend yourself, just listen and imagine yourself in her shoes. When she finishes, discuss what you can do to garner her attention back.
Smartphones And Slot Machines Have Something In Common
You know it well: that sudden anticipation you feel whenever you pick up your phone. Psychologists have a term for that irresistible feeling of unpredictability: intermittent rewards. And guess what other common devices encourage addictive behaviors by preying on that sense that something exciting could happen at any moment? Slot machines. In fact, Price said, smartphones are basically slot machines we keep in our pockets.
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You May Need Help Too
About that counseling, thoughyou may also need to seek counseling for recovery from your own betrayal trauma. Discovering your wifes porn use likely caused deep confusion and paineven more so if there has been any escalation.
Do a search in your local area for sex addicts anonymous programs. Even if your wife doesnt participate, you can contact the leaders to see if there are any programs for the husbands of female addicts for your own support.
Dont underestimate the need for this! Modern American society tends to cast an image of manhood where the only emotion they are allowed to experience is righteous anger. Needless to say, this is absolutely unhealthy. You too are a human, designed to experience a full range of emotions. If you need help to feel them, then get it. Your marriage will be better if you are both healthy and whole.
Explain To Them How Their Actions Are Making You Feel
There comes a time when people need to know that you have boundaries and that theyve just stepped on them. This isnt being rude , its letting them know that their behavior isnt the type you choose to be around. Jasmine, we planned this lunch weeks ago. I arranged my time to be here because youre important to me. I would have more of your attention if I had just called or texted. Can we make the rest of our time together device-free, or should we reschedule? Accept their apologies but not their excuses. If they offer an excuse , say, I wish you would have told me. I would have rescheduled. You can find more tips to make sure youre the master of your phone and its not the other way around in How to Avoid the 7 Most Common Cell Phone Sins.
Medical doctors on call get a pass, and expecting dads whose wives might go into labor at any moment get free passes, too!
For the rest of us, if we have something pending that is going to cause us to check our phones, its only polite to let the other person know in advance so that they can reschedule if they choose.
This shouldnt upset us. This should please us.
Someone wants your attention. Thats a compliment! And if youve set up or accepted an invitation, its inherent in your being there that you need to be giving the other person the gift that no one else can give: the gift of YOUR attention. Its wanted, needed, valuable, and priceless!!!
Hugs and blessings,
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Social Media Apps Are Designed To Hook You
Do you find yourself mindlessly reaching for your phone? Or refreshing your social media feeds, even when you just checked them minutes ago? Don’t beat yourself up. The truth is, nearly every app on your phone has been expertly engineered to produce those very responses by designers skilled in manipulating brain chemistry to elicit addictive behaviors.
Case in point: “Instagram,” Price explained, “has created code that deliberately holds back on showing users new ‘likes’ so that it can deliver a bunch of them in a sudden rush at the most effective moment possiblemeaning the moment at which seeing new likes will discourage you from closing the app.”
Make Your Smartphone Less Appealing
You can also make your phone less visually engaging, by changing the screen to grayscale or turning off notifications, for example. Dr. Alter suggested periodically rearranging the apps on your phone so that they become harder to find and less likely to lure you into a mindless loop of checking and rechecking simply out of habit.
Both experts advised deleting certain types of apps especially the ones you know that you have a hard time avoiding .
Use apps that enrich your life, that add value and meaning or that you need for work, not ones that take you down a rabbit hole, Dr. Lembke said. And if the apps that add value to your life are the same ones that you feel addicted to, Dr. Lembke recommended creating some space using the tips above.
The big question to ask yourself with screens is: What else could I be doing right now? Is there something I could be doing that would be better for me? Dr. Alter said. Thats important now more than ever because of how much time weve been forced to spend on screens during the pandemic.
Annie Sneed is a science journalist who has written for Scientific American, Wired, Public Radio International and Fast Company.
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How To Deal With Wife Addicted To Phone Social Media
Dear Carolyn: My wife of 20 years has become obsessed with her phone. She is constantly checking Facebook, texts and email, while seeming to ignore me and our three kids at home and in the car. While I drive, her head is always down, staring at her phone, unaware of what the rest of us are seeing or talking about. I try to start conversations, but she usually responds with one or two words then is back to her screen.
Several times I have politely asked her to put the phone down, but she responds defensively by saying, “I just have to finish looking at this,” or she rolls her eyes and scoffs as she puts it down. Am I out of line to think she should be more engaged with our family, or am I the one who needs to adapt to the new norm of socialization? S.D.
Carolyn: You had me at the eye-roll.
Phone-gazing, and navel-gazing about our societal phone-gazing, is nearly impossible to escape for anyone in the relationship-gazing business. That means I’ve thought and read extensively on this topic. So pardon me while I take a long, me-centric path to my point: Yes, I’ve often done this reading on my phone. Sometimes when the whole family is driving somewhere, though carsickness often saves me from myself.
Sometimes I go all monosyllabic on my family when I do this.
That’s what your wife’s scoffing and eye-rolling are: contempt.
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Yet, the idea of mywife Marilyn, age 28, dating other guys originally was my idea, not hers. She had been with four different guys before we married. I’d only had sex with one woman before meeting her. Mywife is slender, tall and long-legged with brown eyes and dark brown hair to her shoulders. She is the most attractive woman I’d met or dated.. Apathetic Wife Always On Cell Phone. My wife wont stop scrolling though social media on her phone while we talk. She gives distracted or one word answers to everything I say while she does this. Ive asked her to stop multiple times. Just now, she spent the entirety of a fifteen minute conversation on her phone after I specifically asked.
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How To Stop Phone Addiction In Your Relationship
If your wife is addicted to her phone and her phone seems more important than spending time with you, and her phone use is starting to create problems in the relationship, there are ways of how to stop phone addiction.
The first step in overcoming phone addiction is to find the source of the problem. For example, if your wife is turning to her phone out of boredom, you might discuss with her interesting activities the two of you can do together.
Overcoming your wifes phone addiction begins with a conversation about the problem and the cause of it. Perhaps your wife doesnt realize she is always on the phone.
Begin with a calm conversation in which you express to your wife that her phone obsession makes you feel neglected and dismissed.
When having this conversation, it is important to be empathetic and understanding. Communicate that you are concerned for your wife, too, because the phone addiction is negatively affecting her.
Be careful not to blame her, or she may become defensive. It can also be helpful to point out that your wife has positive qualities outside of her cell phone addiction.
For instance, you may compliment her that she is so devoted to her career, and you would hate to see the cell phone addiction hold her back from her goals.
After you have a conversation, some solutions for how to stop phone addiction are as follows:
There are also apps you can download to track screen time and make an effort to reduce the time spent on the phone.
Signs And Symptoms Of Smartphone Addiction
There is no specific amount of time spent on your phone, or the frequency you check for updates, or the number of messages you send or receive that indicates an addiction or overuse problem.
Spending a lot of time connected to your phone only becomes a problem when it absorbs so much of your time it causes you to neglect your face-to-face relationships, your work, school, hobbies, or other important things in your life. If you find yourself ignoring friends over lunch to read Facebook updates or compulsively checking your phone in while driving or during school lectures, then its time to reassess your smartphone use and strike a healthier balance in your life.
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Use A Screen Time Limit App To Break Your Partner’s Phone Addiction
If you find out that your husband is addicted to phone to an extreme level, you have to use a screen time limit app that you can control. Otherwise, he cannot break away from his phone addiction willingly or if he has control over the screen time limit app. We recommend KidsGuard app through which you can limit the screen time for different apps on your partner’s phone and help him break free of phone addiction gradually.
Realize What Your Screen Habits Rob From Your Life
Often, time on our phones connects indirectly to identity. We find worth in our influence, in our security via information or vigilance , in what others think of us, in our constant productivity.
So beneath that spouse-trumping technology addiction lies a desire for something more than the relationships around us, marriage included. In a sense, we begin to inordinately trust our phones in ways we would normally trust God Himself: His security. His declaration that Jesus has done enough. We are no longer defined by our contributions. His statement of our worth .
Your phone may help deliver groceries. But it will never fully deliver what you crave.
So when were looking for satisfaction elsewhereapart from the Water that never leaves us thirsty our unquenched desires swell disproportionately, leading to a life disordered.
And our spouses feel whats robbed by those insatiable, driving thirsts. Were no longer all there for the people we care about. Our love is no longer sincere , because our minds are distracted, duplicitous.
Presence is a precious form of love. Imagine if Jesus, who became flesh and blood and moved into the neighborhood , had been content to sort of engage with humanity.
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